1. “Ex-boyfriends are just off limits.”
Let’s start off with the basics. So you’ve found yourself falling guiltily for your bestie’s ex-boyfriend or the new guy she will not stop talking about, but nothing has yet happened between them? While you seemingly can’t deny your feelings, you can’t shake the fact that you’ve shared (many) bottles of wine and tubs of Ben & Jerry’s with her whilst she poured tears over him. Oh, erm, what to do? Why sacrifice a valuable friendship that won’t last and is inevitably playing both of you? He obvs wasn’t great the first time when your friend took him for a test ride. Sometimes you just need to ask yourself “Is this worth ruining my friendship?”
Tread lightly when dealing with exes and crushes… if you’ve got something to spill to her… JUST SAY IT GODAMN!
Sometimes you’ve got to be selfless and pick that friend up when they’re down, support them and promote their best qualities; and what better way to show that you care than by planning a quality evening drinking wine, sharing a little dance and watching rom coms till the wine kicks in and you’re asleep on the sofa by 9. Girls, it needs to be done every once in a while. Whether it’s a crappy break up, a rotten day or another episode of ‘Fat Talk’ it’s your job to help pick up the pieces. And remember, never agree when a friend says she’s flabby, saggy, lumpy, scrawny (you name it, we say it). Tell her to shut up. Tell her life is too short. Tell her to eat, drink, and be merry.
It’s the right thing to do. We’ve all been unlucky, imagine having to deal with a makeshift toilet paper pad. Gross. Offering another lady a tampon or pad is a good thing, a very good thing. Pay it forward and you’ll have good karma.
4. Slut-shaming is off limits. Never treat other women disrespectfully – it gives guys ideas.
Slut-shaming is just a projection of your own jealousy. “Oh wow, what is she wearing?” “the walk of shame”. You may not realise it, but what you’re doing is slut-shaming. There are enough bad men on this planet to make women feel bad about themselves, don’t stoop to that level, please. It perpetuates this stereotype that women are catty and can’t get along. If your friend is building herself a reputation, there will certainly be a time for friendtervention later. For now, let her roam free – don’t rain on her parade. If you hear a rumour about what so-and-so did with another guy the other night, avoid those negative labels, because it really doesn’t affect you at all. As women we owe it to one another to support and respect one another’s decisions. We should be building each other up, not putting each other down. In the end, slut-shaming makes us, and ANYONE look ugly, and that’s never a good look for anyone.
Honesty is the best policy. You trust your friends to be honest with you about the things that matter most. While you might fib that her new shoes are to diiiiie for, she might want to know what you think about those more important things. Keep it real when it comes to this. The tables will turn and your bestie will come running to you to help her pick up the pieces when it’s over, so besties, it’s a good idea not to ditch your BFF for him, no matter how pretty or good his body is. As my mother always says, boyfriends will come and go, but real friends will stay forever.
6. If a girl looks intoxicated beyond repair and needs a friend, be her friend.
We have all had that one time when you were hunched over the toilet seat, clearing your stomach of the alcohol that you should not have consumed earlier on that evening. It goes without saying, if you see a girl alone in this position or see her in need of help to walk her across the room…help her. You’ll need that help one day. Good karma and all that.
7. Help a girl out and tell her if she has spinach in her teeth.
Save her some embarrassment. We’ve all been there, looking in the mirror after hours of being in public and realising your appearance is less than perfect, thinking “Why didn’t someone just tell me?!” We’re talking smudged makeup, spinach in your teeth and toilet paper on our shoes. Just let her know.
8. No one likes a trash talker – never hate a woman you’ve never met.
Girl-on-girl crime is definitely not necessary (unless it’s a mutual enemy). Don’t be catty. We don’t like to admit it, but we are all a little guilty of gossiping. However, there’s a difference between venting and malicious trash-talking.
At the end of the day, whether it’s figuring out boy dilemma or avoiding a fight with your best mate, the people who understand you most and still love you are going to be your girlfriends. The basic idea of girl code is to treat others how you want to be treated (a basic rule for life). Keep this in mind to avoid the drama and strengthen the friendships with other women! HOORAH!